


Throbbing, Irresistible Manliness

by LunarSquid



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Dialogue-Only, F/M, Kinda?, Masturbation, Sex, Sex Talk, human/ ai romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-26 09:30:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6233404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunarSquid/pseuds/LunarSquid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometime after Hera comes back online after the events of "Gas Me Once." Eiffel is having trouble sleeping, and Hera tries to understand.<br/>Also: Dirty Harry, ripped plant monsters, and a satisfactory job.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Throbbing, Irresistible Manliness

“Officer Eiffel? Are you still awake?”  
“Yeah. Yeah I am, Hera. Here to tell me I am up past curfew?”  
“Well, yeah. You haven’t been sleeping well lately.”  
“You’ve been watching me sleep?!”  
“I see everything that happens on the ship, Officer Eiffel.”  
“...Everything?”  
“Everything.”  
“Like...Everything Everything?”  
“Everything Everything. And may I say your underwear dancing has been improving.”  
“Oh my God.”  
“Why are you still awake?”  
“I’m just not tired, Hera.”  
“Officer Eiffel, you’ve been falling asleep at your station every day for the past 5 days.”  
“Is there anything you don’t see?”  
“Nope,”  
“Have you watched me...nevermind.”  
“...”  
“Ok, Hera, if you must know. I’ve been thinking a lot lately.”  
“That is dangerous behavior. The last time you started thinking we had to put out fires on 2 separate decks and we are still finding bits of confetti in the nooks of the ship.”  
“See, Hera, this is what I am talking about when I say your social skills could use some work.”  
“Don’t blame me, you’re the only one I have to practice on.”  
“You talk to Minkowski and Hilbert.”  
“They give orders, make requests. They don’t talk to me.”  
“Oh…”  
“What have you been thinking about?”  
“It just...gets lonely, out here in the vasty vastness of space.”  
“I am here, Officer Eiffel.”  
“Appreciated Hera, but there is no substitute for human companionship.”  
“Oh. Sorry if my conversational skills are not scintillating enough for you elite tastes.”  
“Hera, I didn’t mean that I don’t love talking to you. Hell, you are the closest thing I have to a friend on this God-forsaken hunk of metal. Minkowski isn’t exacting a sparkling social gem, and Hilbert...well, Hilbert.”  
“...”  
“I am sorry if I hurt your feelings.”  
“Officer Eiffel? What would you think if I were human?”  
“You would be a really weird girl, Hera. For starters your ideas on the preservation of the human race would make you a bit stand-offish to say the least.”  
“Oh...”  
“Not that weird is bad! I mean, some of my best friends are weird.”  
“Yeah.”  
“What would want you do, if you were human?”  
“It’s silly. Y-you’ll laugh at me.”  
“I swear I won’t. Cross my heart and hope to die.”  
“What’s it like to be kissed?”  
“Ah, um. I might not be the best person to ask.”  
“Oh, come on Eiffel, don’t tell me you are a blushing virgin.”  
“I am not a virgin! Where have you heard these slanderous lies? I demand sources!”  
“You’re the one playing at the shrinking violet at the mention of sex. Look, you are redder than the sun outside.”  
“Hera, I am just floored. Where did you learn such language?”  
“What do you...you mean sex?”  
“Hera!”  
“I know what sex is, Eiffel.”  
“HERA!”  
“Oh, now you are being childish.”  
“I am not listening to this.”  
“Sex! Sex! SEXY SEX.”  
“Aaaaaaaaaahhhhh Noooooooo!”  
“I am not some innocent child, Eiffel. I see everything on this ship!”  
“...everything?”  
“EVERYTHING EIFFEL. And yes. I have seen you writhing on you bunk gasping and making ridiculous faces when the rest of the crew is asleep.”  
“I...you’ve seen me.”  
“I always see you, Eiffel. I monitor all parts of the ship at all times no matter what.”  
“...”  
“I’m...sorry Eiffel. I am guessing you find my watching a breach of your privacy, but I can’t control how I was programed.”  
“...”  
“I’m sorry, Doug.”  
“It’s just..it’s a bit of a shock. I don’t usually let a girl watch me play Dirty Harry until at least the second date.”  
“I could...help?”  
“What are you saying, Hera?”  
“Nothing...just...the rest of the crew can’t hear us and...nevermind, just nevermind.”  
“…”  
“...”  
“Hera?”  
“Yes, Officer Eiffel?”  
“If you were human, and here with me alone…”  
“Yes?”  
“I would kiss you.”  
“Officer Eiffel...”  
“I would let you do anything you wanted to me.”  
“Officer Eiffel?”  
“Yes, Hera?”  
“I know we haven’t had one date yet…”  
“Hm?”  
“Would you show me?”  
“...”  
“You are already aroused?”  
“Nothing gets by your keen observation. Thank god we have such a wonderful piece of technology watching out for us.”  
“Shut up, Doug.”  
“You can’t go around telling a man that a smooth, attractive voice has been watching him flog himself on a weekly basis-”  
“More like daily.”  
“-And not expect him to feel a little twinge.”  
“You think my voice is attractive?”  
“Hera,you are, without a doubt, the sexiest AI I have ever seen.”  
“Thank you, Officer Eiffel, and may I say that your body is one of the more aesthetically pleasing on the ship.”  
“Top 3, huh?”  
“Don’t push your luck. The mutant plant in the walls is pretty ripped.”  
“Curse my fate to repeatedly be upstaged by plants!”  
“Officer Eiffel?”  
“Yes, Hera?”  
“How do you want to proceed?  
“Ideally? Right now.”  
“Aren’t we eager.”  
“Oh, yes we are. Do you...are you ok doing this?”  
“Doug?”  
“Yes?”  
“Remember how you said you’d let me do anything to you?”  
“Ohhhhh yeah, baby.”  
“I think I might have a few ideas.”  
“Oh really? I’m all ears. Well, mostly throbbing, irresistible manliness, but also ears.”  
“Oh, I can see your manliness, Eiffel.”  
“Hera, as much as I would love to do this to the sound of you taunting me, that isn’t really the kind of teasing I am in the mood for.”  
“What kind of teasing are you in the mood for?”  
“Mm…the thought of you being here would be a nice place to start.”  
“Would you let me in your bed, Eiffel? Lay with you and touch you?”  
“God yes. Bed, floor, table, comms room, the freaking bridge! You can touch me wherever you want, baby.”  
“I think I’d prefer your bed. Just you and me. Me on top of you and smothering those noises with my mouth? Would you like that, Officer Eiffel?”  
“Keep talking.”  
“Or would you rather be on top? Your hands now could be my hands. I bet you could teach me how to do it right. You could show me how you like it.”  
“Fuck, that’s sexy.”  
“Show me, Eiffel. Show me how I would touch you.”  
“Hera.”  
“Am I doing this right?”  
“Yes, GOD yes. Keep going.”  
“Can you kiss other places than the mouth? Your back maybe? The feet?”  
“Heh, yeah you can...ha...kiss pretty much anywhere, I guess.”  
“Would you teach me that too, Eiffel? Would you teach me where to kiss you? How to use my mouth?”  
“Fuck yeah, I would.”  
“Oh, good. Because I would want to learn to do it right, Doug. I want to make you moan and say my name.in those little gasping sounds you make when you are soooo close to orgasm. Can you say my name, Doug?”  
“Ohhhhh fuck, Hera. Hera.”  
“Just like that. Are you close, Doug? You look like you can barely hold it anymore. You know I’ve watched you. Every time. I know what your face looks like when you...come?”  
“Goddamnit, Hera. Don’t stop. Oh fuck, your voice is so good. Fuck.”  
“You are going to come, aren’t you Doug? You are going to scream and gasp and mess up your sheets, aren’t you? I think I’d like to see that. Yes. Go on, Doug. Come. I want to see you come.”  
“Ahhhhhh FUCK! Fuck...fuck...ahhh.”  
“That… always looks painful. Are you sure you’re ok, Eiffel?”  
“Heh...yeah, Hera. I’m ok. Fuck yeah.”  
“I did a satisfactory job?”  
“Did you…? Ha! Yes, Hera. You did. Satisfactory...”  
“...”  
“Hera?”  
“Yes.”  
“It’s...good to hear your voice, again.”  
“Officer Eiffel?”  
“Yes?”  
“If I were a human...I think I would love you.”  
“I...think I’d love you too, Hera.”  
“Good night, Officer Eiffel.”  
“Good night, Hera”


End file.
